My faithbuilder... I am thankful for these

I am going to start this blog by giving every single credit to what I am about to tell you to my faith, to the God who created me and to the love of Christ who died on the cross for me.

I am going to continue to tell you that if you are reading this blog and you have never pursued a spiritual relationship with Jesus Christ the God who loves you and created you...today is the day to start. Just sit your booty down right where you are, clasp your hands together, close your eyes, and very simply talk to God about what your struggling with, tell him your burdens and let him know you need him. You need Him now more than ever. Spritual health and the pursuit of understanding my spirit and my God has changed my life in miraculous unexplainable ways... Life is too short to let fear, confusion or the details mess with you. Give it a shot... I promise you... God will NOT let you down. He's been pursuing you your whole life. Just reach out to Him. He will meet you right where you are and watch what happens to your spirit... take it day by day and he will guide you. His promises, truths and love is real, tangible and so very important.

With that said, I am writing today to give an example of how God has touched my life, how He built my faith, a gentle step he took to draw me closer to his plan for my life. I am so grateful, thankful in awe and wanting everyone to know this awesome peace I have in my life because of my faith and my continued spiritual journey as I pray, understand and love God so much.

It is something I want to shout from the rooftops, I want to dance around in the city streets... I want people to know how much God loves them. I want them to not be afraid. To know God's promises for their lives. I want them to be free in knowing more about God. It's not religion guys, its about love and peace and the plan God had for you the moment you were born.

Here's a "faith builder" story... (I will continue to post these here and there throughout my blog)

One of the most pivotal moments in my life was when we first moved here I was skeptical about my new church. Everyone was SO in love with the Lord. It seemed to me that they all had lived their lives memorizing Bible verses, worshipping, had been taught very Christian principles. They loved their Bibles, they prayed a lot. I had a very strong spiritual pull in my life, but never had I done all of that. I felt a little clueless.

Well, I attended a women's retreat right when we started coming to the church. There were speakers, talks about God's specific love and stories shared as to how God had moved through some of these ladies lives.

I thought.. wow... they are SO lucky. I didn't think it would happen for me. I had done too many things God would not be happy with, I had not forgiven a lot of people, I was too angry, I didn't grow up doing the things they did. Later I learned that those thoughts were lies... lies that I believed... and moments later... in prayer I would find that out.

After the talk, they asked if anyone wanted to come up and get prayer for anything. They said if God is stirring your heart with something, come up and they would pray for us. I specifically remember God telling me to go up... telling me that "anger" I had was holding me back from what He had for me in my life. Bittnerness was something that had set itself in my heart and it was not something that he wanted for me.

I didn't like how I was not peaceful, or joyful or had little to no patience. I didn't want to snap at my husband and kids because of the anger that brewed so close to the surface of who I was. I spent a lot of my life being "tough". I would shut people out, use sarcasm, my wit, my personality to mask any hurt frustration or baggage I was carrying around. I was ALWAYS ok... didn't cry much, didn't even get sad much. But I was pretty good at angry and God wanted me to come before him so he could help me get rid of it.

I went up and asked for prayer. My friend Jill prayed for me. I remember she asked me what I needed prayer for and I told her that I was too angry. She didn't know me that well... so I began to just tell her it all. I told her that I didn't like how I would get angry at my husband and kids. She prayed hard. I had never had someone come before God with me and pray so much... asking God to help me asking for specific things for me. Asking God to release me from any anger I had... to love me right where I was. I remember it was a long prayer. I kept thinking to myself... where is she coming up with all these cool things to pray for me about? How does she know what I need? I barely know her!

Immediately I felt a peace come over me. I cried, my heart was lifted, my burdens were being carried away and I was touched by God. I cannot explain it physically, but that day God began something new inside of me that released me from so much of the "junk" I was carrying around. I am so thankful for Jill's faith and specific prayers. I am thankful that I took the step to ask for prayer. I am so thankful God was faithful to me. I found out I can count on a God who will touch me so immediately so specifically that it would change the course of my life. I walked out of that women's retreat with new eyes to see this God of mine. This "religion" stuff wasn't religion at all, it was powerful and good...it can be lived out daily and it is exactly where I wanted to be. Building my spiritual muscles and meeting me right were I needed to be met. Because of a simple prayer... my faith was built.

This was a moment where I knew God was speaking to my heart. Please don't think that I don't ever struggle with anger at all from that point forward. It still rears it's ugly head. But as I walk with God it is less and less. I am being taught by the God who loves me that I am not that tough, that I am a woman who has a heart of compassion love and sensitivity and that those qualities are good and exactly what he wants for me. I am on a journey with God. I am not perfect. This is just one example of a powerful touch from the Lord. (I have more) And now when I feel like I need help in that area. I go straight to my Bible or just say a little prayer to ask God for guidance and He begins another new work in me. Freedom from anger... I am so thankful.