What they DON'T tell you about pregnancy

Well, I haven't had a pregnancy post in while, so I thought I'd keep you all informed. There are plenty of "symptoms" to pregnancy. A doctor can list them all but you will never fully understand them until you experience them first hand. I'll name a couple... and give you some very interesting life examples from the past three and a half months.

Please keep in mind, I am not complaining, as I have said before... with each very apparent symptom, I am super stoked to be pregnant and consider it a blessing. I just laugh at my own ability to block it all out. IF you have a weak stomach please stop reading now.

Moodiness -

As I chase our heeler mix around the yard when I am supposed to be leaving for church the blood shoots straight to my head, I can feel my pulse in my eyeballs, I drag her mercilessly back to the house and put her in the kennel. She is so lucky I don't have the super power of being able to make things combust by looking at them because she would be a pile of ash by now.

Another example is when you are out to dinner with your husband at a restaurant for his birthday and you hear the voice of the waitress at the table next to you and her laugh is like someone put a toothpick into your eyeball. You can hear her making small talk and hitting on a man who is with his wife and teenage kids. You stare at your husband and tell him if she says another word I am going to go over there and tackle her to the ground. (I didn't but... it was close)

Nausea -

Throwing up so hard and for so long... you pee. Hating the way food looks and also your nose because it is what you smell food with.

Water retention -

When you take off your socks and you have a nice little impression of the lines in your sock ON YOUR LEG. PS... it takes some time to go away.

Weight Gain -

You put your clothes on and pray that you can lift your pants up over your booty and get your legs through each leg hole. When you have the monthly prenatal visit and your biggest fear is getting on the scale to "weigh in."

Tender Ta's Ta's -

When you find yourself giving your husband about 10 titty twisters a day to help him understand how senstitive and fragile the girlfriends are. How Nursing bras and regular bras do not work for women who are "well endowed". These suckers are going to grow legs and walk on their own soon.

Exhaustion or Fatigue -

At approximately 2:00pm every day your eyes itch, your mouth is dry, you yawn every 3 minutes and the only thing you can think about is curling up into a little ball and getting into the fetal position and snoring and drooling.

Nesting -

When you look around your house and panic, picturing your new baby coming home to a house that looks nothing like you see in your Company Store or Pottery Barn Kids magazines. (I can't even look at those magazines anymore) You break a sweat at the thought of bringing them into the messy unorganized chaos... and begin to have a wonderfully productive loving conversation with your husband about moving forward with HOUSE PROJECTS!

Cravings -

Once the nausea passes, you eat everything that is put in front of your face. It does not matter what it is, how many calories, what the serving size might be... if it is edible, it is done for!

The "baby"blues -

When you are at your daughter's Monday morning meeting at Elementary school (a little assembly every week) and they sing "You are my Sunshine" and you start crying.

and finally... (this one is kind of gross) Constipation - When you completely undestand and appreciate one of the phrases your friends 5 year old daughter used when she first started going poop on the potty... You want to scream at the top of your lungs... to help in the best way possible - "POO POO COME OUT!"

Have a great week friends!