Thursday, June 9, 2011

My perspective's changing...

I have to say, that although I am being stretched spiritually right now I am so excited at what God has in store. He is putting big things on my heart for riverKIDS, He is showing me new things about myself (how incredibly selfish and yucky I can be) and He is revealing more to me about his love than I have ever understood or fathomed. So with that being said, I think I'm doing all right.

I met with our senior pastor's wife Miss L.... she has an incredible blog and she has been very inspirational to me in my walk with the Lord. But we had coffee the other day. Miss L has loads of kids a HUGE heart for the orphan and a passion to see all of the orphans all over the world experience the love of family. And let me tell you, when I say passionate, she is passionate. It is one of the things I most admire her for. That she makes no apologies for what God is showing her, she is so obedient to Him. Anyway, she has adopted children from Africa, Korea and China, she has also adopted here in the United states and has 10 kids! I don't know how she did it, has done it or continues to do it, but she does. It's a wonderful gift God has given her to have a heart for orphans and to tell the world. When she adopted I from China... God moved mightily in my heart for Him. I never grew in my spiritual walk as much as I did when I was praying on behalf of Isaiah. God gave me my prayer language, I saw his amazing power and love for this orphan and God literally changed the mind of the Chinese government to provide Isaiah a home her in the United States and a family and we are blessed to see him every Sunday.

Anyway, L had been in Uganda in April, she took a team of women there. She has been to orphanages in China. And when I hear her heart for the orphan, it dawned on me. I have NO CLUE what she has seen, what little ones have looked into her eyes. What despair she has witness, what joy she has seen in the midst of devastation. What sadness she has seen in the hearts of little children. I have never been there, I have no clue. I don't think the majority of Americans realize how bad it is in other countries like Africa... and even China for children.

One of my favorite things to do in riverKIDS is to sit with the babies and toddlers and to say the name "Jesus." I love to see the expression on their faces, I love to watch their eyes light up waiting for me to tell them more. Watching them look at me wanting me to say the rest... "loves you." There are millions of kids all over the world who have never heard those words. Who cannot fathom love because they don't have a parent to love them. When L walks into a Chinese orphanage and 30 kids surround her all looking at her like they want to be loved by her... it stamps something on your heart as a Mom. When L walks into the Chinese orphanage to see 60 cribs in one room with many toddlers basic needs being taken care of but hardly any human contact (snuggles, hugs, etc) it leaves a mark on your heart. When L walks down the streets of Uganda and there are street kids living hour by hour for their next morsel of food.... it leaves a stamp on your heart.

And we are here, in the USA with SO much. I have caught myself looking at my home and wanting more, needing a bigger tv, a better couch, bigger home. Desiring my life to look like something out of a Pottery Barn catalog. When in other countries there are kiddos out there who just need a place to lay their head and whispered to them they are loved. Hmmmmm.... what's more important to God? My pretty house or what I have done for "the least of these?"

I'm praying about going to Uganda in the Fall. I told Linn that I am not afraid of going there, but afraid of how going there will effect me. What will my spirit do? Will I ache to take a child back with me? I'm kind of a "no holes barred" kind of chick. My poor husband, but when I get something in my brain... I'm a little headstrong at moving forward with it. But what will God show me? What will he call me to do when I know what I know. Who knows... but I'm excited about it. I'm excited to move in what he wants for me. I'm excited to have my perspective changed and I am thankful for Miss L and her passion for what God has called her to tell people.

I only posted some Josie pics for my friend Carie to see. I have been a slacker on Blogspot. Check out Miss L's blog here...